Pushed to the Limit

I had a follow up conversation yesterday with a mentor and friend about Unfolding the Folds. We were talking about the healthy and unhealthy ways in which we learn lessons in times of failure. I mentioned to him how I struggle with dealing harshly with myself when I’ve been pushed to my limit.

He pensively paused and drew a slight grin. I knew what this meant. I was about to get some fantastic Holy Spirit insight. I mentally dialed in so I wouldn’t miss any of what he was about to say. He asked me if I had heard of “De-bottlenecking.”

He told me a story about when he was younger and working as an operator in the chemical plants. "At certain times, I was instructed to push the equipment past it’s current limitations. I was told to run it harder than before and run it until there’s a malfunction… or a bottleneck. Once things purposefully broke down it was time to see where things went awry. Then we would know exactly what needed to be fixed to make the equipment run better than before. De-bottlenecking is a methodical practice. No one blamed the equipment for breaking down; it was expected."

My friend paused again, with the same patient grin, and let me soak in what he had just said. Then he drew this parallel: “God already knows our limitations. Sometimes we are pushed to our limits to make it obvious to us where improvements need to be made.”

God doesn’t fault us for having limits, and He doesn’t expect us to be limitless. He doesn’t say, “You shouldn’t have a limit in this area of your life.” However, when He sees an opportunity for growth He guides us to (what we think is) the edge of ourselves. He sees our potential and looks past what we are capable of now. He sees what we will be capable of once we let Him get to the jammed places in our life.

I often feel the need to be led to my failure and examine how wrong it was to ensure God knows how badly I feel about my screw up. Sometimes I falsely view God as standing there to point out my failures. Like a pet owner leading Fido over to the stinky pile of mess and sticking Fido’s nose in the accident.

Oh my darling, God’s heart does not look like that. He guides. He never shoves. He isn’t disappointed or surprised by our failures or our limitations. That bottleneck in your life? He’s already there and He’s eager to help you. You haven’t fallen out of His favor. He isn't waiting for you to get your act together before He will look your way. Somewhere along the way we’ve twisted our theology about God’s holiness. We know God and sin don’t mix so we think we have to clean up our messes before God can be present. But this approach implies our sin could overpower God’s holiness. What if we’ve been looking at it all wrong? What if He was more like Mike Rowe from Dirty Jobs. What if He showed up in the messiest, grossest areas of our lives, shovel in hand, and with a rugged smile said, “I’m here now, and this mess doesn’t stand a chance.” This looks more like the heart of God. This looks like Jesus: perfect and holy in an imperfect and sinful world.