"Witnessing a murmuration left me feeling like I had just seen the impossible."

A murmuration of starlings is a beautiful sight to behold. A murmuration happens when a large group of birds fly in synchronization and shift into unusual and unexpected shapes. Starlings are typically the kind of birds who create murmurations. At first, it’s hard to even determine what is exactly happening ...is it smoke? ...a swarm of bees? ...a tornado? ...something other-worldly?! This flock isn’t just flying through life in a normal way. They are purposefully in sync with each other and create a stunning visual that's awe inspiring. Witnessing a murmuration left me feeling like I had just seen the impossible.

That’s how I feel every time I look at my life: like I've just seen the impossible. Not too long ago, there was pain everywhere I looked. I didn't see how my life would ever be "okay" again. I was navigating the treacherous landscape of divorce; a reality I never thought I'd experience. Nevertheless, there I was: surrounded by pain and betrayal. Surrounded, but not overtaken. The only thing I can credit for emerging out of the darkest days of my life is Jesus. He was there even when I wouldn't acknowledge His presence. My thoughts would swarm and swirl around my head. They would fly so fast I couldn't focus on a single one. Not a one would land and rest even for a moment. I knew I wouldn't be able to function for long like this so I started searching for ways to renew my mind. I ran to the Word of God... mainly to escape from my own tormenting thoughts. After all, His ways are higher than our ways, and His thoughts are higher than our thoughts. Honestly, it didn't feel like anything was getting "fixed" in me. Not at first, anyway. The swirling thoughts were still there. But, ever-so-slowly, I realized I was getting better. The thoughts started to land long enough for me to examine them. And because I had been renewing (conditioning) my mind with God's Word I was able to hold each thought up and compare it to God's Truth. If it didn't match up with the heart of God I would toss it out. 

The storm in my mind started to calm. He became my lifeline. Before I knew it I was experiencing more and more times of peace. I still saw pain everywhere I looked, but it didn't torment me like before. I was seeing the pain, but not feeling it as much. I was witnessing a beautiful thing: piece-by-piece God was excavating the rubble which laid on my mind.

Since then, Jesus has brought great freedom and joy to my life. I’m no longer tethered to the pain and hurt of my past. The manner of grace in which Jesus is shaping my life leaves me in complete awe. It seems impossible: a once-broken creature like me, who is getting stronger every day, no longer bound and crippled by unhealthy thoughts. Instead... this little starling is free to soar and share her adventures with you. That’s what Jesus is doing right now… and you get to sit back and watch this glorious display He's creating! 

You are warmly invited to witness some of the impossible things He has done and is doing in my life. Some of these stories are old... some are new, but each starling adds to the beautiful testimony He is crafting. Your story is a powerful display of God’s love and affection for His children. He deeply desires for us to be healthy and unhindered. Sharing our stories of God’s faithfulness empowers others. It gives the world permission to believe God’s Truth: His love is real. It’s deep. And it’s for YOU.